The "Circle of Life" - Giving our children (and their children) Roots & Wings
We recently had the overwhelming joy of attending the wedding of our eldest granddaughter—the sixth of our grandchildren to be married. Each of these young couples has either completed or is nearing completion of their formal education, and each has wisely chosen a wonderful companion.
Standing there, watching her step into this new chapter, brought a profound sense of gratitude. In that quiet, powerful moment, we were privileged to witness "the circle of life" unfolding right before our eyes—a continuous thread of love, tradition, and hope passing from one generation to the next.
Parenting and grandparenting are defined by peaks and valleys. There are exhausting seasons of sowing, quiet moments of doubt, and times when, as grandparents, we wonder if this stage of life still carries a meaningful impact on successive generations. But days like her wedding day are the breathtaking peaks where you are able to look back at the trail, see the magnificent view, and realize that every quiet prayer, every family gathering, and every story shared truly matters. Possibly one of the most important things we can do for our grandchildren is simply to be a steady, loving presence in their lives.
The Foundation Built Before Us
Moments like these naturally invite reflection. As we look back on our own lives, we think with deep gratitude of our own parents. They were loving, but imperfect—just as we all are. Yet, they gave us their absolute best, building homes anchored in love, devotion, and the core belief, when everything else is removed, that family is really what matters - "all that we have".
They didn't have all the answers, nor did they lead flawless lives, but the foundation they laid was strong enough to support everything we built after them. The love they poured into us became the very reservoir we drew from as we raised our own children.
A Legacy Beyond Accomplishments
We often speak of legacy in terms of wealth, property, or titles. But as we watched our granddaughter and her chosen companion begin their lives together, it struck us again that the greatest legacy we can ever leave isn’t found in what we accumulate—it’s found in the choices made by successive generations that lead to fulfilling lives.
Seeing our grandchildren value education, commitment, and family is a joy unlike any other. Our ultimate hope as parents and grandparents has never been for our children and grandchildren to simply replicate our lives - which are imperfect - but instead to stand on our shoulders and on the shoulders of those who have gone before. The highest achievement of one generation is laying a foundation enduring enough for the next generation to reach even higher and accomplish even more.
"There are two lasting bequests we can give our children. One is roots, the other is wings." — Hodding Carter
Roots to Anchor Their Lives: Wings to Fly
Looking at our granddaughter and her chosen companion on that special day, we saw the beautiful result of their parents giving a child both roots and wings:
- Roots grounded in love, strong values, belief that they can accomplish loftier goals, resilience to get back up when they stumble, and a secure sense of home.
- Wings forged through confidence, ongoing education, and the courage to build a future of their own.
When you raise a child with both - marriage of an adult child isn't an ending or a loss. Our daughter and son-in-law didn't lose a daughter that day—they expanded the circle. They gained a wonderful son-in-law, and our family grew stronger, richer, and wider.
We are reminded that "The greatest (and lasting) work we will ever do will be within the walls of our home" — David O. McKay.
Through every valley and over every peak, this is the true heart of the journey: watching seeds planted in a loving home bloom into generations of wise, happy, and thriving lives—and being a steady presence in the lives of our grandchildren as they navigate the challenges and joys ahead.
For Reflection
Every home is a sanctuary where roots take hold and wings are forged. The quiet choices made within its walls reach far beyond our own lifetimes—echoing in the strength, character, and faith of the generations that follow. Retirement years are a golden opportunity to be present in the lives of our grand children.
As we each look back on our journey, and look forward to those who walk or will yet walk in our footsteps:
- What seeds of love and resilience are we planting today?
- How can our presence be a steady anchor for those who need it most?
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